Wednesday, August 31, 2011
Kindergarten Eve
I know I haven't posted anything in a while. I hope to do a bunch of catching up on pictures from Molly and my weekend in Vancouver and Jake's second birthday party soon but in the meantime I couldn't let tonight pass without writing down some of what I'm feeling as I prepare to send Molly off to school for her first day.
I still can't believe she's already old enough to be going to school. It's strange to think that she is starting this chapter of her life. The first step on a road that could potentially last well into her twenties. As I was putting Molly to bed tonight she was crying because she was so scared to be away from me. I reminded her that she's been away from me for years...in day homes, preschools and for play dates and birthday parties. But somehow she knows that this time it's different. It's bigger.
I think I was able to put her mind to rest and reassure her that she would love school. But to be honest, I'm afraid of her going to French immersion. I know how much she likes to succeed and stand out and I'm afraid that this will be too much of a challenge for her. That she will be so afraid to fail that she won't try at all. I'm afraid she'll get hurt or be hurt by other kids and that I won't be there to help. It's really strange feeling all this when I know she's been fine all these years while I've been working. But it's been so wonderful having this summer without work. Having time and energy to enjoy my time with Molly and Jake. I am thankful for quitting my full-time job everyday. But I think having this time has shown me what I'm going to be missing when she's at school.
I still can't believe she's already old enough to be going to school. It's strange to think that she is starting this chapter of her life. The first step on a road that could potentially last well into her twenties. As I was putting Molly to bed tonight she was crying because she was so scared to be away from me. I reminded her that she's been away from me for years...in day homes, preschools and for play dates and birthday parties. But somehow she knows that this time it's different. It's bigger.
I think I was able to put her mind to rest and reassure her that she would love school. But to be honest, I'm afraid of her going to French immersion. I know how much she likes to succeed and stand out and I'm afraid that this will be too much of a challenge for her. That she will be so afraid to fail that she won't try at all. I'm afraid she'll get hurt or be hurt by other kids and that I won't be there to help. It's really strange feeling all this when I know she's been fine all these years while I've been working. But it's been so wonderful having this summer without work. Having time and energy to enjoy my time with Molly and Jake. I am thankful for quitting my full-time job everyday. But I think having this time has shown me what I'm going to be missing when she's at school.
